Today, I meditated. For hours!I was situated on a flat table, wedge behind my knees, no pillow under my head, with Gamma scanner right over my face, so close I could feel the warmth emanating off of it as it scanned every inch of my body. First: head and neck. Then head to toes. And what did I do? I laid there, quiet, not moving a muscle with arms velcroed to my side so that they, too, would not move. And I meditated. And I meditated. And I meditated.
I visualized white light coming through me and exiting. I visualized white light surrounding me. I talked to my guides, my friends, my prayer companions. I listened to them too. I could feel everyone with me all at once. And I waited. I waited for over an hour and finally heard: all clear!
In "Eat, Pray, Love" Elizabeth Gilbert talks about rituals. She says: "We do spiritual ceremonies as human beings in order to create a safe resting place for our most complicated feelings of joy or trauma, so that we don't have to have those feelings around with us forever, weighing us down." (page 187) I agree. In times when we feel the most helpless it is helpful to have a way to find peace with what is happening to us. This is what I found today in this meditation. Peace.
She also says that "...if your culture or tradition doesn't have the specific ritual your're craving, then you are absolutely permitted to make up a ceremony of your own devising, fixing your own broken-down emotional systems with all the do-it-yourself resourcefulness..." I say, whatever works.
It is so wonderful to be in touch with something outside myself that I know is working toward the good in me. My friend Katherine says: "Every cell of your being is Divine perfection." How right you are, Katherine. Katherine was there with me today as was Lynnie, Karen, Melanie, my sister, my mother, Arlene, Bill. my prayer community...all those that I needed to draw strength from. They were praying with me and for me. And I know how powerful prayer can be.
As Elizabeth Gilbert says on page 209: "I sit in silent wonder. I am not actively praying. I have become a prayer."
becoming a prayer is such a cool idea...sounds like you had a good meditation...
ReplyDeletewonder, have you read her new book on coming to terms with marriage?
You were on my mind yesterday and I awoke this morning and wondered how you got on. I remember that Gamma scanner as if it were yesterday...not pleasant!
ReplyDeleteTeri, I'm so relieved for you; to get the 'all clear'...a blessing! xa
sounds like you got through the tests very gracefully!
ReplyDeleteFind job Teri, you've been doing your homework. I'm so proud of you because I know how intimidating and isolating those huge machines can be.
ReplyDeleteI also think that all the energy, of all those prayers, reached you and you found yourself in the middle of prayer circle. How wonderful! It comes from within.... and without.
I am very impressed that you have meditated for a long period of time.. I am up to 5 minutes! but I keep reading how healthy it is -- so I am going to keep trying.
ReplyDeleteahhhhh... beautiful, sweet teri...
ReplyDeletexoxo